Category News From The Front

Santa Claus December 19 Elfidential Address To The North Pole

Category: News From The FrontNorth Pole NewsNorth Pole PoliticsUncategorized Comments: No comments

Santa Claus Seal

Greetings my fellow Elves.

I come before you tonight, because my policy, and by extension, that of my Administration has always been one of openness and full disclosure.I am happy to report that Elfwood Snowflake has returned to the North Pole. He surrendered himself to me, personally, early this morning.

In an earlier statement, Secretary Frost announced that he believed that Snowflake had fled t...

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Elfwood Snowflake Debacle Exposes Real Santa Claus

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Grinch Ponder

I see Santa has taken notice of my Claus is the Cause editorial and added me to his “Naughty List.” While I will address this very soon, I think a more pressing matter should be discussed first. Read further, friends, for the real story on the unfolding NPSA scandal, and look forward to my direct response to Santa regarding Claus is the Cause. 

Here it is, folks...

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NPSA Elfwood Snowflake Breach Confirmed By Jack Frost

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North Pole Dept of Defense Seal

Greetings Fellow North Poleans,

At 0900 on Sunday, we discovered a serious breach of North Pole Security at the NPSA while performing routine maintenance on Santa Claus’ Naughty and Nice database. We can confirm at this time that all Naughty and Nice files were copied...

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A John Waters Christmas

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A John Waters Christmas

You might expect a satirical take-down of the Yuletide season from the man once dubbed the “pope of trash” by no less an expert on such matters than William S. Burroughs. But John Waters is not Scrooge. In fact, he’s resolutely pro-Christmas, albeit in devotion to a somewhat slanted view of the holiday.

In his one-man show, “A John Waters Christmas,” which is at Berklee Performance Center Su...

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Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer Interview Concludes

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Rudolph Interview Part 2

NORTH POLE (TDJ) Today I bring you the conclusion of my interview with Rudolph The Red Nosed Reindeer. In case you missed the first part, you may read it here.

Rudolph Interview Conclusion

When we last spoke, you indicated that “somehow they knew you were there”. What makes you think that?

As I said, only true believers can actually see us, and we all know that CRAZY doesn’t believe in anything th...

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